Proverbs 18:17 The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.

  I remember a time early on in our marriage, before kids, where Lindsay became very ill. We took her to the hospital, and she underwent test after test. The doctor was not her normal doctor and we did not understand his mannerisms. The more he tested, the more anxiety that was built, by his verbiage we were nervous. We didn’t know if she had cancer or worse but through his ambiguity and some verbal leading that’s where our minds landed.  

We often arrive at a judgment way before we hear the full story. Before we process the information, before we hear the test results before we search for understanding. We have allowed in our modern context to champion the quick decision that is not reasoned through and to disregard the patient, thoughtful, searching for answers.

Turned out that Lindsay needed a few weeks of treatment at the hospital with antibiotics. Her illness was in no way as bad as we had thought. As a pastor, husband, and dad, I have taken on the mantra, to wait until the test result comes in before you share with very many people, to let worry grab hold, to make it a big deal. Seems that we are quick to make things a big deal before we ever know their true size.  

I have been quick to judge and I have been the victim of quick judgments and lost who I thought were close friends from shameful accusations without a base. If you are quick to judge, repent, take down the post and listen for the other side. If you have been the victim, be patient, the Lord is holding the circumstance and will by his grace help you through the storm. 

As a believer I am constantly reminded that it is foolish to make a quick judgment without understanding, and without hearing the other side. I am also challenged that relationships are far more important than discounting someone without giving an opportunity for their side of the story. Often there is more information that my finite mind hasn’t been privileged to, hard to believe right?  

Let’s be patient before we start canceling people, canceling reason, canceling the other side of the story.  This will help parenting, at your job, with customers, and even on social media!  

Shouldn’t we hold relationships dearer than to just cancel, to undermine, to slander? I think we are setting ourselves up for failure when we are quick to judge.